He Did This, So I Did That
Updated: Aug 1, 2019
He was finally home, this day, after working long hours for a few days in a row. I had been looking forward to some attention!
I was happily chatting away to him, but he was distracted by some online game, (Risk), on his cell phone. Well, that irked me, for sure! (Firstly, because I dislike video type games, and secondly, I don’t appreciate being ignored.)
Inside I was annoyed, so outside I started to shut down. He asked me for something, and I stopped myself from helping. I’m pretty sure he got the hint when I purposefully closed the cupboard before he could get what he wanted. He decided to go outside, and let himself knock my shoes down the stairs before I could get them on. He did this, so I did that...
By the time we were both in the car a bit later, you could slice the tension with a knife.
You are either chuckling, or judging us as childish...both thoughts apply here.
Within a couple of minutes, I started to smirk, and then blurted out that we were both acting like we were in grade three!
He slowly reached over, grabbed my hand, and we HAD to pray…
One of the best pieces of advice we have ever received was from a good family friend, Mr. Ralph Carr. “Don’t take yourselves too seriously.", he said. And that is all.
Isn’t that the truth? I mean, when I start to think about myself and my feelings and how I should be treated… I can get pretty incensed. And I admit, downright childish and pouty. (I’m not letting my husband off - he can be the same!)
Then, if I allow my bad attitude to continue, it can get ugly!
I learned a ‘new to me’ word not too long ago. I did know of the word, just never fully understood its meaning. Malice - the desire to do evil; meanness. Once I learned the meaning, I realized I was guilty of it. Whoa...What?!
I did just let you in on my nastiness of closing the cupboard specifically to spite my husband...yep...that was being malicious. And so was my happiness over him losing the online game he was playing...mean and childish.
I believe not taking yourself too seriously goes right along with not being selfish. I struggle with this every day. But the only way this relationship (as with any relationship) is going to work, is if we each place the other first, and forgive the other when he makes a mistake, just as I want him to forgive me. Not “he did this, so I did that…”
“So if you’re serious about living this new resurrection life with Christ, act like it... See things from His perspective. Your old life is dead. Your new life, which is your real life—even though invisible to spectators—is with Christ in God... And that means killing off everything connected with that way of death... a life shaped by things and feelings instead of by God… It wasn’t long ago that you were doing all that stuff and not knowing any better. But you know better now, so make sure it’s all gone for good: bad temper, irritability, meanness, ...You’re done with that old life. It’s like a filthy set of ill-fitting clothes you’ve stripped off and put in the fire. Now you’re dressed in a new wardrobe. Every item of your new way of life is custom-made by the Creator, with His label on it. All the old fashions are now obsolete. So, chosen by God for this new life of love, dress in the wardrobe God picked out for you: compassion, kindness, humility, quiet strength, discipline. Be even-tempered, content with
second place, quick to forgive an offense. Forgive as quickly and completely as the Master forgave you. And regardless of what else you put on, wear love. It’s your basic, all-purpose garment. Never be without it.”
Colossians 3: 1 - 14 the Message, loosely quoted